Today I was let go. Well, technically I am still employed by my organization for another two months but today I was given notice and it turned out to be my last day as well. A lot of us are “Unemployees of the Month” it turns out and I feel pretty good all things considered. In fact I feel great. Like a huge weight has been taken off me.
I had a longer run than I thought I would, I learned a lot of neat things and I made some great friends. I also lost interest in working there about eight months ago and I suspect I was even suffering from depression. I didn’t want to be there, I didn’t have any motivation but I couldn’t leave. Or I couldn’t get up the gumption to leave. What we put up with for the sake of money. Until I decided I didn’t care about money and that no salary was worth the price of my soul being sucked dry.
Now I am free. Liberated. I can do as I please.
Except that I’m feeling a little odd. It’s weird to be home in the middle of the day. I feel kind of like I’m doing something I shouldn’t be doing like calling a sickie when I’m perfectly healthy. I also expect that that feeling will pass in a few days and I’ll be sleeping in and enjoying my new life soon enough.
DH is happy for me, which is good. Money isn’t an issue yet, although the belt-tightening has been going on for a while now as this turn of events has been anticipated by me for several months. He did remind me that had we stayed in the old Shoebox house I would likely never have to go back to work, but sadly, Casa Not So Clean has a much bigger mortgage and requires lots of money for maintenance. I know that eventually I will need to seek gainful employment. I have a few irons in the fire so to speak and I’m sure Murphy’s Law will kick in at any time. Either I will find work within days and have no time off or I’ll be off forever and be grateful for whatever McJob I can scrounge up when the money runs out.
But until then I will sleep and read and knit and clean and sort and organize and relax and visit my friends and enjoy the “Lady of the Manor” lifestyle. Today life is good. It’s nice to have my soul back again.
A Clean House is Overrated 
The exact same thing happened to me 12 years ago. Right down to the “I should but I can’t syndrome.” I tell you, it will be OK.
After getting over the initial shock of your post, my first thought was kind of selfish–you’ll have more time to blog. I hope things work out just the way you want. In the meantime, enjoy yourself.
Sorry to read about your job loss but glad you’re able to deal with it well. It may turn out to be the best thing that could have happened which you already seem to know. Hope you get some time between jobs but find something you can love. Any chance of getting back into library work? Do you want to? Best of luck, anyway!