I’m not really religious. If pressed I’ll admit, vaguely, to believing in something. I like lots of things about Hinduism and probably, if a gun was pointed at my head and it was pick something or die, I’d probably choose wicca. I’m not really superstitious and while I’ve been told several times that I have “the gift” of being psychic, aside from occasionally knowing who is on the phone before I pick it up, I don’t think I have any psychic ability at all.
So I’m not sure if it’s a higher power, the fact that I’m on the lookout for something, The Universe or whatever you want to call it, but isn’t it weird when everything seems to point you to move in a certain direction?
Take for example the strange case of Spain. Earlier in the year, the Hubs and I were on vacation. I was reading a travel book about Italy but there was a good chunk of the author’s trip to Spain in it as well. I don’t have a burning desire to go to Spain. I’m sure it’s a beautiful country but right now my sights are set on Africa. But the more I read, the more I thought, hmm, I could go to Spain.
And then, like a switch was flipped, it seemed like everywhere I looked, everything was Spanish or Spanish-influenced. I fell in love with a Spanish-style platter. I didn’t buy it but I really liked it. I started hearing flamenco and tango music all day long on the classical station I keep on as background music. When I went to the bookstore and was browsing I kept hitting on Spanish cookbooks, novels that took place in Spain or Spanish travel guides. Magazines had articles about Spain. People I knew mentioned they were going to Spain. Out of the blue, the Hubs started talking about going to Spain. He rented Vicky Christina Barcelona despite the fact that neither of us really wanted to see it. Spain, Spain, Spain, Spain. The signs pointing to Spain were everywhere.
Now did this stuff happen because we were meant to go to Spain? Or does it happen because once your mind is open to an idea or concept, all of a sudden you see that idea or concept everywhere. Like seeing everyone you know get engaged when you really want to get married or notice that every woman out there is pregnant when you want to have a baby (just examples people, just examples). Was the Universe conspiring to get us to go to Spain or was it just a giant coincidence?
I don’t know. We never did go to Spain. The Hubs’ project at work was uncertain and he didn’t want to take any time off until he knew what was going on (fun fact, his project is still uncertain). I was laid off and the during timeframe that we could have gone away, I spent it going on interviews and fretting about said interviews. I did get a job but took a big pay cut. Money is not as free-flowing as it was last year so a Spanish vacation, while desirable on a lot of levels was not financially desirable this year. So no Spain for us.
But it makes me wonder. If these signs do appear for a reason, what was in Spain that I was supposed to see? Or was I supposed to do something or meet someone? Would my life have changed in some way because I went to Spain? I don’t know. It’s not a burning question that keeps me up at night or anything. Rather it’s more like something to contemplate over a glass of wine or two with friends. But it is interesting to note that once we decided that Spain wasn’t going to happen, all the Spanish “signs” stopped. Or maybe my mind wasn’t open to seeing them anymore.
Hard to say. I keep my eyes open now though. And I wonder where the Universe will want me to go next. I’m hoping it’s South Africa (still waiting to see signs about South Africa though) but one thing I have learned is that sometimes the Universe and I don’t always see eye to eye on places to go. And sometimes, when I have that glass of wine in my hand, I wonder, what was waiting for me in Spain? I’ll likely never know. But I am watching. And waiting. For the next sign.