It is no secret that I do not care for my in-laws. I have not-so-affectionately nicknamed them the “outlaws” and I frequently wish they’d drop off the face of the earth. She has a special talent for annoying the snot out of me with her passive-aggressive behaviour and him, well, he’s just a jerk.
And it’s also no secret that holidays are angst-filled for us. And likely for most couples. Where to eat the holiday meal and who to eat it with causes all sorts of anguish. Christmas and Easter never fail to elicit huge battles that last for days. But not Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving has never been a problem for us. For one simple reason.
It’s our anniversary and we made it very clear to both families that we’d celebrate it how we wanted to. Which meant, with each other and far away from both sets of parents. My parents have been ok with this. His parents, well, his mother at least, connives every year to get us to have Thanksgiving dinner with them. And every year we’ve managed to avoid it.
This year is different. We had planned to go to New York City for an extra-long weekend. But, with me being laid off, New York being expensive and money not as free-flowing as it could be, we decided to give the Big Apple a miss.
So, we thought we’d head up to the cottage for a weekend of romantic bedroom painting. Which is not a euphemism. We were planning on painting two of the bedrooms up there. But the couple who is currently renting the place, decided to stay up there instead of going home to their families. Which means they probably don’t like their in-laws much either.
For the first time in five years we had a conundrum. Each family celebrates on Sunday. We knew from our first Christmas as a couple that two turkey dinners in one day was not going to happen. Where would we eat turkey? And who would we eat it with?
Because the Hubs had invited his parents up to the cottage last month and I had the distinct displeasure of spending three days with them in a small house (that’s a wank for another post) and I’m still harbouring violent tendencies from that time, I decided that for everyone’s safety (and my sanity), we’d each spend Thanksgiving with our own family. I was fine with it. The Hubs was fine with it. My family was fine with it. I figured his would be too.
I knew it would just be me and my mom since my sister and her family will be celebrating Thanksgiving with her on Saturday. But the Hubs doesn’t know this. He thinks, and I’m not dissuading him of the notion, that my entire family will be at my parents’ house on Sunday. He does know that my dad will be at work though. His entire family will be at his uncle’s house and while I really enjoy his aunt and uncle’s company, I’m still having some trouble suppressing the urge to kick my FIL in the head. Which is why he’s going alone.
Or he was until yesterday. Last night the Hubs went to his parents’ for dinner. He mentioned the holiday plans to his parents and his mom told him that married couples should be together on the holidays so he’d have to go with me to my family’s dinner. WHAT?! The dinner which my mom was making special for me? (Her breaded chicken breasts that I love more than any other food in the world.) The dinner that was just going to be me and my mom? The dinner where I didn’t have to cook or clean up or watch what I said? The dinner where I was planning on gossiping and complaining about the outlaws? The dinner where I was going to laze around afterwards and knit to my heart’s content? Yes that very dinner. And afterwards he wants to go to see his family for coffee so I still have to see the outlaws. CRAP!
So now we’re in damage control mode. We’ve concocted stories as to why my sister and her family won’t be there. We’ve changed the menu. We’ve basically made it no fun. I keep telling the Hubs he’s more than welcome to go on to his family’s dinner. That no one in my family will hold it against him for not showing up. But he’s not listening to me.
Way to go MIL. You’ve managed to poop a party you weren’t even invited to. And once again you’ve guaranteed that I continue to be not thankful for having you in my life.