Miscellaneous minutae about married life.

I read this on dooce.com which I found last week and honestly, HOW did I live before reading this blog?  I mean really.  Recovering Mormons?  Smart assy blog posts?  Crankypants behaviour?  Everyone being entitled to her opinion?  This woman is my hero.  I.  LOVE.  HER.

Ahem.  Anyway.  It’s yet another meme that talks about trivial aspects of married life.  Because you don’t already know enough stupid stuff about me.

What are your middle names?
DH doesn’t have one and mine is Rose after my aunt.

How long have you been together?
We met in Feb 05, got engaged Dec 31/05 and got married Oct 06.  Between Feb 05 and Dec 05 both DH and I were out of the country for about a month each.  At the time I didn’t think it was that fast but in retrospect maybe we could have waited a few more months.  Not that that would have changed much really.

Who asked whom out?
He smiled at me, I smiled back, he waited three months to email and the rest is history.

How old are each of you?
I’m 36 and he’s 39….we both have a birthday in the next 45 days.

Whose siblings do you see the most?
Mine.  She lives in close by.  His doesn’t.

Which situation is the hardest on you as a couple?
We have different views on family (not kids but extended family).  His view is more old school/old country and mine is, well, not.  Things are better now but early on in our marriage we came very close to divorcing over how much time to spend with his family.  Even now we spend a lot more time with his family than I’m comfortable with.  

Also DH has some issues with communication.  Just because he knows what he is talking about doesn’t mean the rest of us (ie me) do.  Years of telling only half (if that) of the story to his parents/extended family have made it hard for him to open up despite the fact he probably wants to.  He’s working on it but it’s hard still and remains an issue.

Also, I am wilfull.  To put it mildly.

Did you go to the same school?
Nope.   Although his sister and I overlapped a year at  so it’s likely DH and I were in the same town at the same time.  DH and my sister were in the same town at the same time and more than likely in the same bars.  Which kind of icks me out a little, even though I know my sister wouldn’t have been interested in DH and DH wouldn’t have been interested in her.

Are you from the same home town?
Nope again.  He grew up in the city where we now live and I grew up about 20 minutes east of it.  He had no reason to go east and, apart from fabric shopping, I had no reason to go west.

Who is smarter?
Loaded question.  DH can do complex math in his head and has a ridiculously amazing memory for dates and weird stuff like air planes specs and other military crap.  I often point out that he can’t remember what he had for dinner last night and that drives me mental.  He also can’t argue js way out of a paper bag.  DH is pretty smart when it comes to economics and he follows current events like mad.  But he has next to no EQ and can’t read social cues to save his life.  

I have photographic recall, am super observant about just about everything, know all kinds of weird and wonderful information (I’m a librarian…duh) and make excellent party chit chat.  I’d say I know just enough to be dangerous.

Who is the most sensitive?
That would be DH hands down.  Unless it comes to animals and then I’m all over it.

Where do you eat out most as a couple?
We go to an awesome all-you-can-eat sushi place not far from my office at least once a month.  We’ve also been going to a cheap and cheerful Vietnamese place close to the house which is great too.  DH has food “moods”.   I’m less fussy but prefer indie restaurants over chains.

Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?

Who has the craziest exes?

Who has the worst temper?
Also me.  And I hold a grudge.  Although it takes DH a long time to get angry but when he does….it can get ugly.  We both yell but he calls me worse names.

Who does the cooking?
Me once again.  DH’s specialties are cold cereal and burnt toast he claims.  But he takes me out when I don’t feel like cooking so it all evens out in the end.  That being said, I would like to come home to a home-cooked, edible dinner at some point in our marriage.

Who is the neat-freak?
We get bent out of shape about different things.  He has a hate-on for wearing shoes in the house, which I could care less about.  I go mental over the way he washes dishes.  I also cannot stand the way he tosses his newspapers in piles all over the ENTIRE house.  And how come he can’t notice globs of blue toothpaste in a white sink?  I am not house proud by any stretch but I am probably neater than he is once I get organized.  I blame the librarian in me.

Who is more stubborn?
We are both Taurus’.  It’s probably a tie.

Who hogs the bed?
I would if he wasn’t bigger than me and harder to move.  That being said, he’s a cuddler and while we both start out on my side of the bed he usually makes his way back to his side at some point during the night.  Once he’s gone in the morning though I sprawl like the best of them.

Who wakes up earlier?
DH.  I would stay up until 3am if I could.  Which means I’d be up at noon if I was lucky.  He’s a morning glory.  Me, not so much.

Where was your first date?
A coffee shop in a city midway from where we both lived.  We met at 9pm and were shocked when at 12:45 am they told us they were closing in 15 minutes.

Who is more jealous?
Depends on the issue.  DH would like me to be jealous about his past girlfriends I think, but I won’t bite because I don’t care.  He is jealous of my time when I choose to spend it with others, especially if he doesn’t have anyone to play with.  He is also a little jealous of the fact that I was wild in my youth but am old and boring now.  I am jealous when he elects to spend time with his parents/immediate family instead of with me, especially on days when we are both home.

How long did it take to get serious?
He says he knew after a month that he wanted to marry me.  I was still deciding if I liked him or not at that point.  I knew in April I wanted to see him and only him, by May I knew I loved him and by Dec I knew I’d be spending my life with him.

Who eats more?
Did I mention he’s bigger than me?  DH wins this one hands down.  And I can eat let me tell you.

Who does the laundry?
DH has been told that if he ever touches the washer/dryer again it is grounds for divorce.

Who’s better with the computer?
Neither of us are all that great.

Who drives when you are together?
Mostly DH.  I am an adequate driver but unless we are going to my family/friends’ events he has to drive.  And even then I sometimes make him drive my car.  His car is standard and I don’t drive manual.  He also knows our city like the back of his hand and I choose not to know how to get many places.  All in all DH drives maybe 95% of the time we drive together.

So that’s us.  Or at least my take on us.  Tell me about you and yours.


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